Gain Freedom from Anxiety

If you suffer from significant anxiety, please know two things.

First, know you’re not alone – anxiety rates have steadily risen over the past 15 years. The adult anxiety rate in the United States rose by a third from 2008 to 2018, and during the pandemic, anxiety spiked even further. Although the rate has eased from the pandemic peak, it was still more than twice as high in April 2024 (17.5%) than in April 2019 (8.3%.)

Second, know that anxiety isn’t your fault: hard times may have left you with unhelpful ways of viewing yourself and your life situation. For some, anxiety begins with a difficult childhood, while for others anxiety develops in adulthood as a response to trauma or job or relationship challenges. Either way, severe anxiety can be hard to overcome without professional help.

How Anxiety can Hamper Your Life

Anxiety is a chronic thief of joy. Even when life seems to be going well, it’s hard to truly trust that it’ll stay that way. On some level, we fear that the rug will be unexpectedly pulled out from under us, and we’ll be caught woefully unprepared. This fear makes it hard for us to truly relax, and keeps us from fully savoring life’s joys. Moreover, anxiety can distract us from being emotionally present for those we care about, even when we really want to.

Anxiety also puts us at risk for developing depression and stress-related physical problems, affecting the body in many ways. Insomnia and extreme fatigue are common, as are headaches, nausea, and muscle tension. When anxiety spikes, so does our blood pressure – the heart pounds and it can feel hard to breathe. Finally, anxiety can increase our irritability and decrease our libido.

How your Thought Patterns May Drive Anxiety

Various thought patterns drive anxiety, and these thought patterns are often intertwined:

• Fear of Conflict: Sometimes people feel anxious because they fear they’ll be rejected if they don’t always put other people’s needs over their own or if they ever appear to get upset. Conflict really scares them.
• Unrealistic Standards for Self: For others, anxiety is driven more by basing their self-esteem on exceedingly high standards of performance. While it’s healthy to want to achieve, people with high anxiety often fear that even occasional, minor slip-ups will make them look and feel like imposters. Nobody can feel secure if their sense of worth depends on flawless performance.
• Anxiety about Anxiety: Along with these unrealistic thought patterns, what often also worsens anxiety is fear of losing control when anxiety strikes. As noted, anxiety can lead to racing heart and trouble breathing that can feel truly frightening. After several such anxiety attacks, people may start to dread having such an attack catch them by surprise, particularly if they’re in public and feel they can’t escape. Thus, anxiety attacks breed fear of further anxiety attacks, creating a vicious circle.

Of course, our minds often avoid admitting how overblown our fears really are. It can feel embarrassing to admit that our thoughts are out of control. This difficulty in accurately viewing our thoughts is one reason why it helps to work with a therapist who can gently point out our unrealistically negative thought patterns.

Why Therapy Works

Trying to cope with anxiety alone can be very hard, and involving others is often ineffective. Friends and loved ones mean well but often don’t get the extent of one’s challenges. Such misunderstanding may intensify one’s feelings of isolation and make it more difficult to ask for help. It’s also normal to struggle with comparison and guilt. People may feel guilty about bringing their troubles to others or may negatively compare themselves to people who appear to be in control of their lives. Such feelings can increase their sense of inadequacy and distance them from others.

This is why therapy works better than self-help or just relying on friends.

A trained therapist can help address the root causes of anxiety and promote healthier ways of thinking and behaving. Moreover, therapy offers a safe, supportive space for people to express and process their emotions, and to learn strategies to better manage stress. As you learn to tame your anxiety, your life will feel much freer and you’ll feel more confidence in handling whatever new challenges life throws your way. You owe this gift of happiness to yourself, so reach out for help today.